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What to do if your best friend is dating your sister

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You told them everything. I hate to tell a really negative story about your experience.

Youg just want you sjster know that I know exactly how terrible this feels for you. You have lost something. Maybe we all have to mourn the loss of this kind of unconditional connection at some point. My best friend and I used to talk Job dating nord pas de calais hours on What to do if your best friend is dating your sister, without a pause. We used to write songs and perform together. We were so full of ideas and so open-hearted and so young, and we really loved each other. So all I can say to you is this: Forget how they told you you it, how you said you were bothered sistre they did it anyway.

File all of that under: Two People In Love. You probably griend the groundwork for them to fall in love, too, because What to do if your best friend is dating your sister had that shared love of you, that shared knowledge of you, right out of the gate. Maybe you learned, with each of them, how to be a good friend, how to listen, how to entertain, how to open up and tell the truth, and you taught them these things, too. They told a few little lies to protect their chances at love, to prevent you from coming between them. They have not trespassed against you, OK?

I would be very careful about that. You can flag some obvious potential pitfalls of three-way communication, but I would not try to control what they talk about. If you get pissed about information getting passed between them, you could hurt them and hurt yourself and make a big mess. Keep your nose clean. If you have to detach a tiny bit, then do it. Most of all, though, I want to tell you to keep your heart open to them, as open as you can possibly stand. Platonic friendships between women are defined in such casual terms. Close friendships with women age differently. Even so, at that wedding, I looked at my ex-best-friend and thought: We may not spend much time together, before we die.

How many people do you meet, who make you feel completely understood — sometimes to a fault? There was a magic to our friendship, to our collaborations, to our most mundane conversations. So keep your heart open. Admit that you feel terrible, and try to explain this loss without blaming them for having caused it. You can and you should make new friends. Forgive them and keep them close. You will get caught in the middle sometimes. And this can be hard to figure out, as a sufficient level of arousal can make every person of every gender think their potential lover is the most interesting person in the world.

So, is she actually cool? Or does she just rustle your proverbial jimmy? Men tend to overestimate the interest level of hot girls, because emotion is contagious. Often, this is not true, which is why the first date is a valuable no-stakes screening procedure. One date with this girl could have a huge effect on your friendship. So, you should do some preliminary examination first. Make an excuse to hang out with her in a totally platonic setting. Do some sort of vaguely excusable professional coffee. Tell her you want to plan a surprise party with your brother.

Dating Your Best Friend’s Brother: Is That Acceptable Or Too Close For Comfort?

Just get two hours to chill out with her, and see whether your perceived chemistry is a real thing -- if you have the kind of bubbly, clicky conversation that we all dream about. If so, and if you still want to go ahead, then you have to take the painful next step. Tell Your Friend Yes, tell your friend that you plan to ask her sister out. But be aware that your friend might freak out, throw a drink in your face, put you in a triangle choke, and spend all night writing your name in his blood on the wall of his holding cell after he gets arrested. Or he could be totally cool with it. But there are some nasty possibilities here. Ask Her Out Whew! Now, just ask her out, like you would any other woman.

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